A seven-day Acumen Media Report by Tonya Khoury. I have so much content this week that this report is going to write itself. I ask you to #ScratchTheSurface of the South Africa’s great #Telenovela. If you’re a fan of this report, you’ll know that I’m a court room drama fanatic. A real-life court room drama not that #Suits stuff. I have to say that my jaw has dropped more often than I care to count this week.
Let’s start with the very big one, #SenzoMeyiwa. What a farce this week has been. To start the telenovela, you had journalists chasing witnesses around, jumping from room to room while the witness tried to play hide and seek from the rampant cameras.
Look I don’t blame the journos for their relentless hunt. The witness was #Madlala one of the individuals that was in the house the night of the murder. The defence took great exception to the great chase and the advocate even said that media have played such a bad role in this case. She went on to mention the damage that had been done by the Netflix documentary and that she feels all media should be removed from court immediately. She’s right, to a point; had that doccie not come out we certainly would not have a #Telenovela of this trial.
The judge was furious, he’s quite temperamental this guy; he banned the entire set of journalists and our telenovela went silent. One older gentleman, still in court, decided this was an opportune time to become a YouTube superstar. He started broadcasting from within the court. We all tuned in but what did we find? Some terrible TV production as we stared at a man with a grey beard and the sound didn’t let you hear a word of the trial. We resorted to Twitter in the end; good old Twitter kept the trial alive for our hungry eyes. After gushing apologies, the media was allowed back in and then the real drama started.
#Mdlala’s story makes no sense. According to him, he was on crutches, but still had the ability to run, hide his phone, have a bash at the “intruders” and, as if that were not enough, he said Kelly Khumalo’s mother (a granny) decided she would have a go at the intruders herself. Apparently Senzo also got in the ring and that’s when he was shot. How many gun shots, they asked? #Mdlala didn’t know. He said he couldn’t hear. He couldn’t hear? Gunshots in the same house… yeah right. What’s up with this trial, though? How can no one know what happened? How do “new” dockets appear magically that were never there before? The people in the room are meant to have been Senzo’s nearest and dearest and yet here we are watching an outrageous #Telenovela.
Swap courtrooms with me and join a ridiculous, and I cannot say this strongly enough, a ridiculous telenovela, where Dali Mpofu threatened the chair LIVE on the teevee. Let me try and break it down for you. It’s complicated so bear with me: #Concourt (a different telenovela) had ruled that #Mkhwebane could go back to her job. This drew the wrath of many and woke up the country’s legal teams all at once.
The DA, Civil Society and others send letters through the night to #Dali. Dali #Mpofu was preparing to interview another one Madam Busi’s staff, and he was suddenly flooded with urgent applications. So many applications and letters, one even came from the President who wanted answers by 9am. Dali didn’t sleep, and my goodness did it show; he was grumpy, actually he was rude, incredibly rude, much ruder than you’ve ever seen him and #Mpofu, let’s be fair, can get pretty peeved. He told the chair that he would not be able to participate in the proceedings and that Madam Mkhwebane had a sick note anyway, so these proceedings couldn’t continue in her absence. Sick notes, the sign of a great telenovela.
Short story the judge said that Dali could go sleep but proceedings would continue with other parties who wanted to question the witness. He further explained that all interactions were recorded, and Dali could catch up later. The rage. The extraordinary rage of #Dali made more riveting television than any soap opera. If he could have climbed through that Zoom call and pinned the chair to the wall he would have done it. He started hurling insults at the chair telling him that he should respect his elders!
Come again? I’m confused; when did age trump law? Anything goes in a telenovela. Cue dramatic music as Mpofu said to the chair he would “pay for this” and he should just “watch and see”. When the chair asked if that was a threat, Dali retorted like a true movie star, “That is not a threat that is a promise”. I expected Clint Eastwood to walk in next with a poncho. I hooted with laughter as you shouldn’t well because this is the state of our nation. Current status: #Dali is under investigation for threatening a chairperson at a seated enquiry. He has been further love bombed with paperwork. Stay tuned. #HoldUpHey get ready for the #nextepisode
All the while we have the great presidential race running on another channel, here apparently, the too-sick Zuma (not a bad description) called a sitting of his own at #Nkandla. Here he told everyone in his gang to vote for #Nkosozana #WhenPeopleZol #Dlamini #StillAZuma. And where’s cupcake? Well, our Prez went to a dam that burst. He told the people who lost lives and homes that he wouldn’t abandon them and now he’s off to attend the #QueensFuneral. This is a strange telenovela, here we just swap story lines, because Cyril seems to have forgotten about the #KZNFlood victims, Nelson Mandela Bay without water and that pesky set of terrorists that keep bombing #Eskom. I mean really that’s pushing the Novella too far. And media don’t even go there. News aren’t interested in the Insurrection Telenovela
Look there is other news but nothing compares to what we are seeing playing out in Britain. I’m not sure what you call it. We in South Africa have experienced the massive loss of #Mandela and the country paid tribute for an entire month; in fact we still do it now. However, we never saw the likes of the Queen’s death. Everyone expected pomp and ceremony. I did expect horses and carriages, even gun salutes, but what I didn’t expect is for her coffin to be traipsed across the country and every single celebration to be cancelled that might have been planned in the UK.
I’m also really worried about Charles, he is walking a LOT and he’s not spry, and let’s be fair, he’s quite old. I hope they let him sit a bit. It’s super impressive to see London and the entire UK decked out in Royal Memorial. I’m not a royalist but that woman spent her entire life in service, so I get it. I lived in London for a long time and was there at the death of Diana, it was extraordinary. I do have some questions though so forgive me for this. Do you think that coffin is made of lead or do you think they’ve embalmed her? I mean she’s been driven all over the countries and now is lying in state for another four days. Please tell me they haven’t got a body in there and that she’s in cold morgue storage. And if she was embalmed, I mean ewww… I don’t want to think of it.
I had to check my facts so I phoned a friend and her mum in the UK, a non-royalist and a royalist. Firstly, it’s a big deal, the whole world should know that. This is a massive deal. Secondly the response to my gross question was “well of course she’s embalmed – what are you an idiot?”.
I laughed and I hope you did to. My condolences to you, Great Britain. The end of an era and a very very dramatic telenovela.
I’m Tonya Khoury and you’ve just scratched the surface with Acumen Media.
YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgGjpJfZSai13qLEN0696Ow
