The cops arrested the cops. This is not unusual in South Africa; we have arrested (and charged) many police commissioners in our time. The most astonishing thing about this story is not that finally we arrested the #DirtyDozen but that #SenzoMchunu wasn’t among them. Divert and destruct, while the despicable walk free.
Rewind. It was a pretty picture, chaps; I’m not going to pretend I wasn’t smiling. Twelve appeared in court, all now charged with tender fraud. Remember that floozie who got up and did a twirl and told us how her butt was a national asset after Vusi Muzi ‘Cat’ Matlala paid R80k for her BBL?
Well, she was there too. This time her make up wasn’t on point and I swear even her bumbum was sagging as the charges were laid and bail was set. Madam didn’t have the R80k bail and begged for it to be reduced to 10k. I’m not sure why she didn’t leave her national asset as collateral. But hey, I’m a dreamer. #DirtyDozen got nailed by the #MadlangaCommission
There were two crooks who were conspicuously missing from the #DirtyDozen: Senzo #ThePurse Mchunu and Fannie #Masemola. Well, Fannie faced separate criminal charges and even got his own special date to appear in court where he, too, will be charged. That’s only happening in April, why? Ungaaz. Special treatment ?
Apparently, the narrative has changed now, you see; the suspended/special leave minister actually initiated an audit that helped lead to the cancellation of the tender that killed Babita. What? Really? What? You’re mad if you believe that.
A R320 million tender is why people like Babita get gunned down. Senzo also had the temerity to tell us the #DirtyDozen “developments were unfortunate” and that, wait for it ,… no one is above the law. Drops mic, exits stage, faints and then tries again. How’s my job, chaps? Ludicrous.
Unaffordable health care
At the core of all this is the suffering of people who need critical healthcare. That’s who these numties have robbed, the average guy on the street who needs the unaffordable care for his health. Sick,hey?
And cupcake? Well, he had Firoz ‘the dinosaur’ Chichalia come out and say he needs an urgent meeting with the president to address the “SAPS crisis”. That’s like calling what’s happening in the Gulf a “conflict”. #DirtyDozen
And then in Parliament, Enoch Godongwane (there’s a joke there but I’m going to leave it), stood up as our finance minister with his fly wide open until other parliamentarians said, and I quote: “Something’s hanging out… please put it back inside and zip it up.”
He then tried to rectify his wardrobe malfunction but still didn’t get it ,right? Does he drink? Highly entertaining but dismal.
And then, you will never ever believe me, but I have proof: #KallieKakKriel said there is no “white genocide” in South Africa. What do you mean, KKK? You turned our country on its head for nothing? Have you told the orange one that you lied? Are you going to go to jail now like the dirty dozen? Am I the only person who thinks he should be put in front of a judge? Divert and destruct – while the despicable walk free.
Dereleen and Gayton
And then Gayton and Dereleen had a barney. Disgraced Gayton MacKenzie threw a verbal punch at Dereleen on Facebook Live. He said he has security, and according to her, that intimated that she should have some too because Gayton’s goons might be coming for her.
I don’t know guys, I just read the news. I remember Dereleen Jones from decades back when she called into a radio station with a letter that was titled: “Dear Dad” (addressed to then incumbent President Zuma). She unpacked the state of Eldorado Park, which has suffered a drug scourge for decades.
She got the attention of JZ ;he walked Eldos with her as she pointed out house after house containing drug dealers that the police collect handfuls of cash from on a daily basis. Oh, you thought this corruption thing at the Madlanga commission is Dereleen’s first rodeo with crooked cops and failing police commissioners. No ways, this chick is solid.
This woman is an activist, she gets the job done. Right now, after all the rot uncovered in the #SapsAdhocCommittee, she’s being an absolute champion and if she didn’t get your attention as a voter, she should.
Unchecked xenophobia
The only thing problem with #ActionSA is Herman. His xenophobia is unchecked and he will clamber over his promises to get to the prize. We saw him do it with the ANC in the last election when he promised us he would not work with them or the DA again. Only to work closely with both in this extraordinary political landscape we navigate called a GNU. #Electioneering
And then the heart wrenching murder of the #CCMALawyer in broad daylight in the streets of Joburg. We watched as news media pushed too hard at her husband. The world stopped for a moment for Chinette Gallichan but it didn’t stop for the other 14 women killed on that day.
Nor did it stop for the 110 who were raped on the same day. It also didn’t stop for the three children killed on that day in the place we love with all our hearts, South Africa. It’s a dreadful story, a story that doesn’t even make sense. Why kill a lawyer when another one will arrive next week? Why was she another #Babita, what did she know? There is more to this story, time will tell.
AfriForum and Razmatazz
There was other news. Afriforum is taking Fikile ‘Razmatazz Fear Fol’ Mbalula to court for a R600 000 trip to Dubai in 2017? Are they trying to distract our attention from the false claims of white genocide? Everyone went to Dubai, guys, all the dirty dozens and dozens.
Thabo Bester appeared in court dressed in Louis Vuitton and shackles. He defended himself and the judge called his application nonsensical. The whole story is. Why are we still watching? #Distraction
The soldiers are on the streets in the Cape Flats, the fuel price is terrifying as we start calling it #CarMotorVirus. Estimates as much at ten rand a litre hikes on diesel. What will happen to our food prices? And who is leading this nonsense anyway?
Oh yes, radicals. The same radicals who are having a negotiation with themselves. Iran trolls harder than Trump trying to get a deal done. They use Lego animations that are really funny to troll Trump’s failing war. Trump presented a 15-point deal and Iran returned to sender with a list of five criteria that they will not waiver on.
Hegseth the scapegoat
The Orange Jabba the Hut is schtuck because he cannot win this war and unbelievably, in a turn of events no one expected, Iran gained a great deal of respect during a very frightening time. Trump said he was negotiating and Iran said he was negotiating with himself and there was no negotiation.
The conditions need to be met. He thought it was a win when he told the world that Iran has sent him a present. This was funny, he wasn’t going to tell us what the present was, but you can guess. It wasn’t a golden pager, that would be a threat right? No,no they sent him exactly what he asked for. Oil. Four tankers of black gold. #TrollingHard
All the while the land of my father’s people, the land of the Cedar trees, the land of Khalil Gibran, is being flattened like Gaza. Make sure you’re watching the distraction not the destruction. Oh and before I go, in case you weren’t aware, Trump didn’t start any wars. It was sweaty feet Pete.
Trump has singled out Hegseth as the fall guy for the failure of yet another American/Israel manufactured war. #DirtyDozens and #Distractions.
Enjoy your long weekend. I will not be here next week. Don’t look for me, don’t phone. I’ll be out of range and sight as I finally get back into the water as Sodwana fills up with glorious holiday makers. This is a much better distraction.
Tonya Khoury is the founder of Acumen Media.
