I love social media. I really do. But I hate it just as much as I love it.
I love it because it’s a stage, where thoughts can arrive dressed for the occasion and leave an impression. I hate it because it’s also a mirror. And mirrors magnify our flaws, our sin and our secret hunger to be seen.
I think it’s safe to say, we’re not okay.
Why I love it
Social media created an industry of creators
“When I grow up, I want to be a doctor” has, for many, become “I want to be a YouTuber.” Not just a shift in career choice, but in power. Ownership now sits in the hands of the individual.
It opened us up to versatility
For brands, this is gold. Gone are the days of relying solely on TV and magazines. Brands now compete for our attention on the very screens we can’t put down. It has also opened the door for ordinary people to partner with brands, get paid and build careers from what used to be hobbies. The gatekeepers are fewer and the possibilities, louder.
It made normal stories extraordinary
What once existed as a fleeting human-interest piece on the 7pm news now lingers on our timelines. Parents, couples, the elderly… every now and then, humanity breaks through the noise like sunlight through a cracked door. It reminds us that, despite everything, we still care, and I love that for us. Finding these moments while doomscrolling feels like stumbling upon grace.
It democratised voices
We no longer wait to protest in person; we take it to social media, the one place where almost everyone exists. It has given courage to those who might not have it in the physical world. If your voice shakes in person, it can still echo online.
Strangers feel like cousins
We’ve become a strangely homogenised society. In South Africa, our comment sections are often filled with “they’ve found us,” or “nikhona?” No one feels far removed because the thread that connects us lives in our hands. We no longer need to leave home to experience the world.
It brought information closer
We once relied on the University of YouTube. Now, TikTok delivers the same lessons, faster, sharper, and tailored for our shrinking attention spans. News, commentary, thought leadership; it’s all there.
Why I hate it
Performance replaced presence
Social media has become a breeding ground for cringe, or at least the fear of it. Trying is no longer seen as endearing, it’s scrutinised. So instead of exploring, we perform. We edit ourselves before the world can. We anticipate critique before it arrives. We’ve moved from cheering strangers on to quietly waiting for them to slip. The result? Sameness. A curated sea of people too afraid to be fully themselves.
It magnified comparison
And in that, we start to lose ourselves. We measure our lives against metrics that were never designed to hold meaning. Someone who has 30k followers makes my 34 feel like failure. But if 34 people were in your home, hyping you up, you’d feel rich in community, right? So what are we chasing? Arenas or intimacy? Applause or connection?
Everything is measured in engagement
The social media gods assign value through numbers that are visible, trackable, comparable. And so we chase them. Which brings me to influencer marketing. Does placing your brand in the hands of someone with large numbers truly translate to impact? We’ve confused visibility with value. And in doing so, we’ve contorted ourselves to fit what performs: ragebaiting, oversharing, and manufactured moments. All in pursuit of a number that proves we were seen.
It became our acceptable dopamine hit
This is where we should draw the line. Bring back analogue living. Slow walks without something filling your ears. Letters instead of long Whatsapp texts, pouring your heart out only to be left on read. Birthday messages sent at midnight because they meant something, not because a reminder told you to. Addiction has been rebranded as productivity, as staying “in the loop.” The systems know exactly what they’re doing. They are designed to keep us here. As a creative, that unsettles me, deeply.
Our doomscrolling is contributing to our trauma
Have you noticed how hard it’s becoming to articulate simple thoughts? The rise of filler words, the pauses, the searching. A mind constantly consuming has little time to process. And I get it; the world is heavy. So we scroll, to escape and to numb. But if we are not intentional, we will consume ourselves into disconnection. From thought, from feeling and from each other.
My parting shot is this: social media has done a remarkable job of connecting us, but it has also insidiously unravelled the very fabric of what makes us human. It’s become both the thread and the blade. The responsibility is ours, to choose how we show up and what we consume. To choose to be human in a world that is constantly asking us to be anything but.
Sharine Mokgoko is digital copywriter at VML South Africa.
