Confronting the rising trend of toxic femininity in the workplace, with recommendations on how to identify, and counter this malignant phenomenon.
I began my career as a cadet journalist in 1988, stepping into a newsroom dominated by men. As a young woman, I had to constantly prove myself, working harder and faster than my male counterparts to earn my byline.
This relentless fight shaped my career and today, I see women in all industries around the world, many at the top of the ladder.
Yet, despite our progress, we are still fighting to be taken seriously.
And amid this, a new challenge has emerged: the rising trend of toxic femininity. This phenomenon is subtle, often masked by the guise of compassion and honesty, but it manifests as bullying, belittling and nastiness among women in the workplace.
Toxic femininity refers to behaviours and attitudes among women that perpetuate negative stereotypes and harm other women. Unlike toxic masculinity, which is often overt, toxic femininity is insidious, operating under the radar and often justified as “honesty” or “tough love.”
It plays out in many forms, including undermining a colleague’s competence, exclusion from important meetings, spreading rumours and excessive micromanagement. These behaviours create a hostile work environment and undermine the progress women have made towards gender equality.
Beyond the stereotype
Toxic femininity in the workplace can be traced back to a mix of sociocultural and psychological factors. Societal expectations often hold women to outdated and harmful gender stereotypes, such as being passive, docile, and cooperative. Manifested in. the workplace, these stereotypes lead to behaviours that discourage ambition and assertiveness.
In some cultures, traditional gender roles are deeply ingrained, perpetuating toxic behaviours. Women may feel pressured to conform to these roles, even in professional settings. The competitive nature of some workplaces can exacerbate toxic behaviours. Women might adopt aggressive or backstabbing tactics to get ahead, mimicking what they perceive as successful male behaviours.
On the psychological side, certain personality traits, such as Machiavellianism, narcissism and psychopathy (often referred to as the ‘dark triad’), can contribute to toxic behaviours. These traits can lead to manipulative and self-serving actions. Women who feel insecure about their abilities or position may engage in toxic behaviour to assert dominance or protect their status.
Additionally, some women may internalise negative societal messages about their gender, leading them to undermine other women to align with male-dominated power structures.
By understanding these root causes, we can better address and mitigate toxic femininity in the workplace.
Outing Machiavellian machinations
A well-known example of toxic femininity in the workplace is the concept of ‘Machiavellian Mary’: a woman who is superficially agreeable but actually ruthless and self-focused, often creating friction and distrust among colleagues.
Such behaviours can lower morale, damage productivity and contribute to a toxic work environment.
Facing and addressing toxic femininity requires a multifaceted approach
- Recognising and acknowledging the issue through open discussions about toxic behaviours can help bring them to light.
- Establishing mentorship programmes and support networks for women can foster a positive and collaborative environment.
- Implementing training programmes focused on communication, conflict resolution, and leadership skills is also crucial.
Women have fought hard for gender equality, and it is crucial that we support each other rather than tear each other down. By fostering a culture of solidarity and mutual respect, we can create a more inclusive and empowering workplace. If left unchecked, toxic femininity can undermine the progress we have made towards gender equality.
Addressing it head-on paves the way for a more equitable future.
As women in media, we have a unique platform to influence change.
Steps we can take include:
- Leading by example, demonstrating respect, empathy, and collaboration.
- Mentoring younger women and helping them navigate the challenges of the workplace.
- Advocating for policies and practices that promote equality and address toxic behaviours.
- Educating ourselves and others about the impact of toxic femininity and how to combat it.
Men also play a crucial role in creating a positive workplace culture. Encouraging men to be allies involves educating male colleagues about the impact of toxic femininity, inviting them to join mentorship programmes and support networks, and fostering open dialogues where men feel comfortable discussing gender issues and supporting their female colleagues.
Influencing the influencers
Social media has revolutionised the way we communicate and interact, both personally and professionally. Platforms such as X, LinkedIn and Instagram have become powerful tools for networking, sharing ideas, and building professional brands.
However, they also have the potential to amplify toxic behaviours. Negative comments, rumours, and personal attacks can spread rapidly, creating a toxic online environment that spills over into the workplace.
To combat this, it is essential to promote positive online interactions and hold individuals accountable for their behaviour on social media. Encouraging respectful and constructive communication can help create a more supportive and inclusive digital space.
In today’s digital age, social media and influencers play a significant role in shaping perceptions and behaviours. The 18-second attention span of social media users means that messages need to be concise and impactful.
Cancel culture
Influencers can use their platforms to promote positive behaviours and call out toxic ones. By promoting positive workplace practices and calling out toxic behaviours, influencers can play a crucial role in fostering a healthier work environment. They can use their platforms to highlight stories of collaboration, mentorship, and support, setting a positive example for their followers.
Cancel culture, while often seen to hold individuals accountable for their actions, can also contribute to a toxic environment if not managed carefully. It is important to differentiate between holding someone accountable and engaging in public shaming.
Constructive criticism and open dialogue are essential for addressing problematic behaviours without resorting to cancel culture.
By working together, we can create a workplace that is fair, respectful, and empowering for everyone. As women in media, we have the power to set the standard for future generations, ensuring that our children grow up in a world where equality and respect are the norms.
Ingrid von Stein is an independent communications strategist, journalist, podcaster and human rights activist. As a Global Peace Ambassador for the Tutu Foundation UK, she leverages her expertise to drive impactful change. With a master’s degree in communications science, Von Stein serves on various industry and NGO boards, and has been recognised with numerous local and global awards for her business innovations. A dedicated mother and mentor, she continues to inspire and lead in the fields of media, marketing, advertising and branding.
